Be My Valentine? A Trip Down Romance Lane

4 Feb

Whilst Valentine’s Day can send some men into a state of blind panic usually manifesting itself in some truly awful gift choices, I am a convicted diehard or at least try hard romantic. My notion of what romance is has changed somewhat through the years and I thought I would take you on a nostalgic trip down romance lane.

My first ‘love’ was a girl I met at playgroup, I was 4 but she had me at “do you want a ride on my space hopper”. I would ask Space Hopper Girl every single day if she loved me and every single day she said yes. One day out of nowhere she said “no”, my little world imploded, I absorbed the information slowly and then flew into a wild rage kicking her stupid space hopper with all my might.

My next dabble with matters of the heart was when I was nine. With Valentine’s Day on the horizon I saved like I had never saved before, marching into the newsagents I threw my money on the counter and demanded the biggest box of chocolates they had. The cashier although no doubt impressed by my cavalier approach informed me I was some way short of the biggest box but perhaps she might like this small to medium sized box? I slipped the chocolates into the girl’s satchel, scribbling something suitably obscure about roses and violets on a card and waited for cupid to do his thing. Unfortunately my message was so obscure that the girl thought my best friend James had written it and he wasn’t about to deny it. I never spoke to James again.

After a romantic encounter with a girl I went out with for 2 weeks but never actually spoke to, we stayed on opposing ends of the playground too scared to take that next step of actually speaking, I decided that my heart could take no more. Instead I put all my attention into balls; soccer balls, tennis balls, basketballs and occasionally ping pong balls. Whilst those around me were slow dancing at discos to Wet Wet Wet ballads, I preferred to skid around on the floor like a maniac; surely girls wouldn’t be able to resist my skidding prowess I thought. It’s fair to say I was romantically naive. One particularly bold girl once asked if I was a virgin, to which I replied no I am a Taurus, I wasn’t quick witted enough for it to have been a joke.

But you can’t keep a diehard romantic down for long and as I moved into my teenage years I raised my game to epic proportions. Love letters were sprayed with my dad’s cologne and sealed with a kiss, jewellery was handed over (always heart shaped and always gold, in colour at least), marriage proposals were meticulously planned, I may even allegedly have recorded myself singing something slushy and posted the tape to its intended target but that is purely speculation and I couldn’t possibly confirm that it happened. As I set about pushing the parameters of the word nice, I watched in horror as girls fell at the feet of the boys that treated them not very nicely.

By the time underage discos became appealing romance for me was best expressed by the length of the kiss. All of my kissing advice came from my Dad, I was terrified that I might accidentally suffocate someone if I did it wrong, luckily my Dad was on hand with some pearls of wisdom. I once kissed a girl for about 40 minutes without coming up for air; I must have really loved her, the next day it hurt to talk because my jaw had been locked open for so long. Thanks Dad.

My University Years were all about combining ‘romance’ with alcohol. One particularly ‘romantic’ encounter earned me the nickname “Bath Candles”, a nickname that sticks to this day in some quarters, after I attempted to woo a lass with a candle lit bath and nearly burnt the house down.

In my final year of university I met my wife. After our first date I said one of the most romantic (and cool) things I have ever said to anyone in my life, I looked into her eyes and said “I’m going to have to insist that we do that again” – and we did and we still do.
Romance now is about making Anna feel like the most important person in the world. It’s about tracking down that little something I have noticed her eyeing up in a shop. It’s about taking her to that restaurant she always thinks is out of our budget. It’s about saying the things she wants to hear and meaning them. After a shaky start I now consider myself romantically grown up.

This year my Valentine’s Day Flowers have been taken care of by the lovely folk at Roses Only. In exchange for delving into my romantic closet, and what a closet it is, they are sending me and Anna out for a beautiful meal; throwing in a baby sitter and an obscene amount of roses to boot. Remember chaps garage flowers don’t count!


22 Responses to “Be My Valentine? A Trip Down Romance Lane”

  1. Lisa February 4, 2013 at 2:26 am #

    You were the boy in primary school I always wanted 😉 Girls are suckers for those gestures, well done! I hope you and Anna have a perfect Valentines together. Unfortunately for me, my husband doesn’t “believe” in Valentines Day, bugger.

    • daddownunder February 4, 2013 at 2:29 am #

      Thanks Lisa. Perhaps that’s because he’s romantic all year round Lisa?

      • Lisa February 4, 2013 at 2:34 am #

        erm… yes. that’s it 😉

      • daddownunder February 4, 2013 at 2:35 am #

        ………………..or not : )

  2. Wendy February 4, 2013 at 4:51 am #

    We are going to see Kitty Flanagan on Valentines Day sans bub so that should be wonderful 🙂 Anna is a lucky lady 🙂

    • daddownunder February 4, 2013 at 4:52 am #

      Thanks Wendy. You can’t go wrong “sans bub” – enjoy Kitty!

  3. Julie February 4, 2013 at 11:07 am #

    We will be on a plane, with our Bub, travelling to Fiji. I bought and organised the holiday as a 30th birthday present for Justin. (We actually met Valentine’s day six years ago) Will he remember? Most likely not. Is he romantic? Rarely. So for me garage flowers would count. But I am use to him not being romantic, and I still love him with all my heart.

    • daddownunder February 4, 2013 at 11:24 am #

      Sounds like you have got the romance side covered Julie, can’t compete with Fiji!

  4. Twitchy (@TwitchyCorner) February 5, 2013 at 2:37 am #

    What a great post- so many pearlers in the one. You most certainly are a die-hard, your tenacity is engaging. Anna’s gain is undoubtedly the single-lady-world’s loss. Best wishes to you both! #teamIBOT

    • daddownunder February 5, 2013 at 9:41 am #

      That’s right women love tenacity and it sounds much better than try hard ; ) thanks for commenting IBOT

  5. Have a laugh on me February 5, 2013 at 3:21 am #

    What a catch you are. I was one of the silly girls in my younger years who went for the dicks who treated me badly. Thankfully as I grew older I grew wiser. I came across my bestie and soulmate, who is romantic when it counts, eg proposing to me on the concrete foundation of our house while it was being built – Great post 🙂 Emily

    • daddownunder February 5, 2013 at 9:44 am #

      That’s an awesome proposal Emily, can’t top that! I’m glad you called them dicks, I concur

  6. Amanda @ Cooker and a Looker February 5, 2013 at 3:46 am #

    Have a great time! Nice work – Roses Only!

    • daddownunder February 5, 2013 at 9:47 am #

      Meal, flowers and most importantly babysitter, how can it not be a great night? I hope you have one too Amanda!

  7. Zanni Arnot February 5, 2013 at 9:15 am #

    You are the Valentine every girl ever dreamed about! I remember waiting and waiting for those roses, and they never came – except one from my husband when we first met – from a petrol station! One!
    Beautiful story. Anna is one lucky lady to be lavished in romance…I’ll tell you, not every guy is great at it. Good on you, setting an example! x

    • daddownunder February 5, 2013 at 10:34 am #

      Thanks Zanni, that’s lovely. Maybe this will be the year your hubby surprises you? I hope so. In fact send me his email and I will put some pressure on him ; )

  8. Kelly HTandT February 5, 2013 at 9:40 am #

    Such a sweetheart! Your wife is a very lucky girl 🙂
    I think my most romantic move was to give my husband a key that was engraved with the words “To my heart…” Unfortunately he’s never matched it. Sigh.

    • daddownunder February 5, 2013 at 10:35 am #

      That’s uber romantic Kelly! Come on chaps raise your game!

  9. Blakey February 5, 2013 at 10:00 am #

    Matt please could you have a word with Richard. Thanks x

    • daddownunder February 5, 2013 at 10:38 am #

      Send me his email Jo and I will put the pressure on! I would have picked him for an old fashioned smoothie?

  10. Kylez @ A Study in Contradictions February 7, 2013 at 12:00 pm #

    Dude, you do realise that you’ve just put 99% of our husbands to absolute shame! This should be required reading for all 16 year old boys!

    I must admit I’m not much of a romantic myself, but for mine and Dave’s first Valentine’s Day I sent him crazy little gifts on the mail every two days for the fortnight leading up to V-day, from a ‘Secret Admirerer’ and it drove him nuts, he had no idea it was me! Hs whole family was in on it though and they thought it was hilarious, as did I. On the last day, V-day, I included a poem with clues to my identity and when he figured it out he was a tad embarrassed! Bt he thought it was nice and he still has a couple of the little things I sent him.

    Dave is not a romantic at all, and the only time he has ever bought me flowers, he got home from work about three hours before I did, put them in a vase on the table and then forgot about them. So after about two hours of being home I’m in the kitchen getting a drink when he rushes in, points to the flowers on the table and says “I forgot to tell you, those are for you”. I’m a lucky lady!

    • daddownunder February 8, 2013 at 3:06 am #

      I reckon if you get flowers from someone who is not romantically inclined it means even more!

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